You can't make this $hit up

Mom: I don't know how you live in a place without Christmas Tree Shops or Ocean State Job Lots.
A.: And yet, somehow, I manage.
Mom: This vacuum cleaner is amazing. Does yours get under the sofa?
A.: Yes.
Mom: Is it heavy?
A.: If I answer that question for the sixth time, will it stop you from asking a seventh?
Mom: Huh. What brand is it?
A.: Electrolux.
Mom: You know, I looked everywhere for a gift for Irina--she wanted the same kind of radio/CD player I have--and I searched high and low [and mom took a good five minutes to tell this story] and eventually I found just the right thing at Walmart. That won't be possible anymore when Obama destroys Walmart--he and his mafia of unions--like he did the auto industry. And I don't blame companies for moving to China--who would want to deal with the union mafias?