On friends

Remember my post a few weeks ago about the conference freebie of a Bohemian crystal that roommate left around, presumably because he'd seen that I had an actual Bohemian crystal downstairs? In my post, I was perplexed at what he meant by leaving the corporate-logoed crystal around, and found it presumptuous, and just *incorrect,* to equate the conference freebie with the crystal a friend had brought me back from Prague.

Well, last night, I had an analogous reaction to this guy's take on friendship.

A good friend had invited some friends over to his apartment to celebrate his 30th birthday. It was a very fun evening, and as I was chatting with people at the gathering and talking about how various people knew the mutual friend, I thought back to how this friend, and another friend with whom I'd corresponded earlier in the day, have been through a lot together. We've been friends through a lot of difficult as wonderful experiences, and we've been there for each other. This friend, in particular, was there with me the evening I broke down in a movie theatre as the emotional toll of a much-needed but still upsetting breakup caught up with me. I've been there for my friends under similar circumstances, which inevitably come up over the years. They don't have to be especially difficult circumstances-- being there with people, and having people there with you, through the milder ups and downs of life, is what also strengthens friendship.

So who does RM think he is to presume friendship after less than six weeks of our having met (much less managing to annoy the crap out of me in that small timeframe)? In previous posts, I've only addressed this glibly: there are people with whom I like to spend my free time, and he's not one of them. That is a true statement, but it's not the key issue bearing on the state of our 'friendship.' How dare he presume a place in my life comparable with that of my actual friends?

Should he once again choose to play the friendship card, I'll be more than happy to set things straight.