Crazy Monday just kept going

I was on the phone with mom when the plumber arrived.

A.: How was the concert?
Mom: It was great. Oh, Lyena's pregnant.
A.: That was fast.
Mom: There was one point where someone offered her wine but she said she'd just have water. And then later her husband said he'd go get her mineral water. So someone just asked...

[Knock, knock]

A.: Mom, I have to go. I'll call you back.

The plumber left around 10pm and I spent another half-hour cleaning up and arranging things. I realized I should call back, or else mom might get concerned. So I did.

A.: Sorry about that, plumber was here.
Dad: What for?
A.: I don't even want to talk about it. It's complicated, it's over, let's just move on.
Dad: Did he rip you off?
A.: No, not at all, I just don't want to talk about it. It's going to take to long to explain.
Mom: How much did he charge?
A.: $190. Anyway...
Dad: That's not bad. How long was he there?
A.: About an hour and a half. Lyena's pregnant...

Dad's not as obtuse as Mom, but that's not saying much. One of the most telling stories of Mom's obtuseness happened the day I moved to DC many years ago. My new roommate was helping me bring in boxes, as were my parents. I'll save for another time--maybe this afternoon--the story of why Mom made that move in general difficult, and get to the source of the 'obtuse' accusation.

Mom: What's in this box labeled 'unmentionables'?
A.: I'll tell you later, mom.
Mom: What's does that mean?
A.: I will tell you later.
Mom: What is it?
A.: I. will. tell. you. later.
Mom: Just tell me now.
A.: I said I'll tell you later.

Would you agree that a non-obtuse person would have figured out by the first or second 'I'll tell you later' that there was a reason that that moment was not a good time? I didn't expect her to realize that I didn't want to blurt out, "that's my underwear" in front of my roommate of one hour, but you'd think she'd figure something was up?

I don't need to go back over six years, however, to gather an example of obtuseness--after all, there was the whole Google episode. I don't need to go back that far, either; I'll just go back to last night:

Mom: Did I send you that forward about Messing?
A.: No.
Mom: Should I?
A.: No.
Mom: Do you know who he was?

I know it's almost 11; I know I've been up since 4 and I'll get up again at 5; and I know I do not, at this time, care.

A.: No.
Mom: Should I tell you?
A.: No!
Mom: Oh, know, you have to hear about this.

So she went on and on and on and on about this psychic.

This would be a good time to bring up another general rule about human interaction, along the lines of 'if you give advice, don't use 'should'' and 'if you want someone to listen to you, don't start with 'you could never understand...'' It goes, 'if you want someone to listen to what you have to say, pick a time to say it when they're more receptive. You may know that they're not receptive if it's past their bedtime or they've just said they don't want to hear it.'

Finally, she stopped, but the obtuseness continued:

Mom: So should I send you the forward?
A.: No! I guarantee you that I will not read it. I don't have time...
Mom: Oh, but there's nothing to read.

This morning I found that an hour later, she did send it.

Anyway, the obtuseness continued, this time from dad. And mom.

Dad: So, the plumber was working on the bathtub?
A.: The plumber was working on the dryer. On which, all costs factored in, I've spent a disproportionate amount of money given how little I'll use it. But that was largely of my own doing and I don't want to talk about it. I just want to move on.
Mom: Of course you don't need a dryer! Why would you need a dryer?
A.: Goodnight.
Mom: Why a dryer? They smell.

Had I been any less tired, I would have pointed out that fabric softener sheets, rater than dryers, themselves, smell. Perhaps I would have gone into how the decision to get a dryer was tied with the earlier hope, which I may yet revisit, of finding a roommate. I could have also talked about how the decision to get a dryer in and of itself caused little problems; rather, it was the silly, silly move of arranging to get a free dryer off of Freecycle only to discover that it was fifteen years old--functional, but as an environmentalist, I refused to use it--and having to have a gas connection installed for it before I realized it was so old. But I had been thinking of doing that anyway, again, out of a desire for energy efficiency. And once the existing washer started to leak, I figured it would make sense to get a dryer with the washer so that the would stack. At this point, the hookup and installation have cost me nearly as much as the dryer, but I have a high efficiency washer that does not leak and gas dryer that stacks on top of it, so I want to write off the cost as 'learn from your mistakes' and move on to 'now that you've overpaid for it, enjoy it. For example, I can wash my sheets on Thursday morning before I leave for my trip, as well as dry them and put them back on my bed (yes I suppose I could just use a different set of sheets but that would be too easy). However, as you can see from the length of this paragraph, I was not inclined to get into any of this at 11pm, particularly once you factor in interruptions, questions, etc. I. Just. Want. To. Move. On. You've heard enough about the dryer, I've said enough about the dryer, and I'll be very upset if I have cause to talk about the dryer again, either because I have to hear it about it from my parents or because something goes wrong. But it won't. I'm moving on.