Crisis made real

I'd written, several months ago, that while I never take my employment status, much less my job, for granted, and I have much compassion for people who have lost their jobs or haven't been hired, I had yet to experience survivor's guilt.

Thing is, you can go about your business in the Washington area and ask yourself, "what recession?" Stores are packed, restaurants are packed, etc. It's one thing to read about something and have an academic sense of compassion about it; it's another to see real people, with real hopes, who really have things to contribute.

See, I walked into a public sector job fair. My cube-neighbor had gotten a call from a friend of his who was going, and it turned out the fair was taking place across the street from our office building. He and the friend finished grad school together, and the friend hadn't yet found a job. The cube neighbor offered to meet him there, and asked if I wanted to come along. I said, "Sure-- may as well troll around for free stuff." He said, "what??" I repeated, explained. Now, it's not like I need more conference freebie junque, especially since RM had taken to sharing his and passing it off as art, but I developed this habit when I was looking for work, and it made me feel like I wasn't completely wasting my time, even when I knew the odds were slim that anything would come of the job fair. Like many silly coping mechanism habits, it stuck. Luckily, in this case, it had redeeming value: my cube-neighbor found a ton of crappe that he could give to his (small) kids. He leaves town every weekend to see them, and buying them something every time was "getting expensive," so I did him a huge favor by leading him to the stress balls and light pens.

But I digress. The point is, the place was packed. Lines were long. I felt bad being there--it felt voyeuristic--and that was not my intention. I really hope those people--the qualified among them, anyway--which I bet are most of them, get hired.