Saturday breakfast, or the old normal

Mom: Mmmm, this oatmeal is so good.
A.: Thank you.
Mom: It's too bad your dad doesn't eat oatmeal. He tried it once when he was in the army, so he's sure--
Dad: I've told you a million times, we never had oatmeal when I was in the army!
Mom: He gets something in his head, and there's no introducing new perspectives.
A. :Why is there a safety pin in the salt bowl?
Dad: Who the hell knows? On this kitchen table, it's possible to find anything.
Mom: On the other hand, if dad weren't so conservative, we probably would have divorced by now.
Dad: It's never too late.