Tuesday, December 24, 2013

What does this have to do with Christmas Eve?

Mom: Your Aunt Sonya--she married mom's brother, and was very proud of him, even bragged about how he'd never met a whore he could pass up. Mom liked her... she didn't like his first wife; she was of that nationality mom didn't care for... the anti-Semites...
Dad: Poles.
Mom: Right. But Aunt Sonya was family. She was a large woman--tall, with a big, solid rear-end--from Odessa. Everyone at Kuznechny Market knew her. The first time she and my uncle "spent the night" together, she wasn't impressed and she let him know. He said he was just constrained by the fact that her sister was asleep right next to them on the other side of the bed. That's the way it was those days--everyone shared a one-bedroom apartment with the rest of the family. Anyway--why am I telling you this?
A.: I don't know.
Mom: I mean, what does this have to do with Christmas Eve?
A.: I have no idea.
Mom: It was too bad, when they divorced, we didn't get to see her anymore. He also remarried, and they ended up in the same apartment building as the other couple. What does this have to do with Christmas Eve?
Dad: [Shrug.]
Mom: He never did meet a whore he didn't like. But I don't know what any of this has to do with Christmas Eve.

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