Sunday, October 12, 2008

the key is to attune

Mom: It's all about attuning. We're all energy...
A.: Mom, I'm going downstairs to do yoga.
Mom: No! This is more important! Listen to me!
A.: I've been listening to you ALL MORNING.
Mom: Two more minutes.
A.: Grrrrrrr....
Mom: So then, she healed him, and your father didn't have to go through with the operation. We're all energy. Remember that.

I make it downstairs. Dad comes down a few seconds later.

A.: You'd think you would know better whether it was your arm or leg that was clogged.
Dad: About 50% of what she said was accurate. Some was confounded, some made up.

***
I don't remember how we got onto that topic, but I do know that we were having an ordinary but interesting conversation for a while, and before I knew it, mom was lecturing about energy and chakras and how important it is to "attune."

Mom: When the doctor told your father that he had to be operated on right away...
Dad: That's not actually what he said...
Mom: Yes it was.
Dad: Actually...
Mom: No! That's what happened. He said operate or else...
Dad: Not quite...

This escalated, voices rose, and mom was soon screaming about what the doctors told dad. Yesterday, they got into the following screaming fight:

Mom: TURN IT OFF! THE WATER IS BOILING!
Dad: That kettle turns off on its own.
Mom: NO! BY THEN THE WATER IS OVERBOILED! THAT'S NOT HEALTHY! I WON'T DRINK OVERBOILED WATER! WE HAVE THIS CONVERSATION EVERY TIME AND YOU NEVER LEARN!
Dad: The water isn't even boiling yet.
Mom: YES IT IS! YES IT IS! IT'LL BE OVERBOILED!
A.: Can you please not yell about this?
Mom: I WILL NOT DRINK OVERBOILED WATER! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! WE GO OVER THIS EVERY DAY!

This went on for a few minutes. But back to this morning:

Mom: It was just like when you disappeared in Europe, and three different psychics told me you were fine. One told me you were on the train. Another visualized a backpack.
A.: That was hardly a stretch. I was backpacking through Europe. And of course I was fine-- I left you a message saying that I was fine and that I wouldn't be able to call for a few days. I never *disappeared* in Europe.
Mom: No, there was no message. I didn't know what to think. Then, the psychics told me you were fine, and you called the next day.
A.: Mom, I paid some exhorbitant hotel calling rate to call you and tell you that I would be in transit for the next few days and would not be able to call.
Mom: One psychic saw you on a train. The other said you had a backpack. I don't know how they knew. This all goes to show, we're all energy. And then, with your dad's leg...
Dad: Actually, in that situation it...
Mom: No! It was your leg.
A.: Can I go downstairs now?

1 comment:

Saha said...

While the psychic didn't also see a "museum," "cafe," or even "old buildings," you should be thankful that they neglected to mention "bong" or "drunkenness."