Apparently I have magical powers

Thanks, Allen, for bringing this to my attention. Thankfully, it only takes me about two glasses.

***
After [a quite large] dinner, mom was telling a story.

Mom: So, then he called and... wow, you really have gained weight!
A.: Just tell your story, mom.
Mom: No, it's just that I turned my head and couldn't help but be distracted by your protruding stomach.
A.: He called and...
Mom: Right, where was I?

***
It's fair to say that I don't generally have that effect on people. I have yet to experience, for example, a situation at work where a coworker loses his or her train of thought as a result of catching sight of my protruding stomach. Then again, mom would say they're just being polite.

Funny that this hasn't happened elsewhere. When I was at the airport, the TSA screeners didn't lose sight of the baggage because their gazes were drawn to the enormity of my protruding stomach. Nor did my stomach alter the gravitational pull at Home Depot last week. I went to a party the weekend before last; I wouldn't say that the size of my gut stopped and diverted all conversation when I showed up.

Perhaps I'll be more attuned to this phenomenon in the future.