the burden of proof

Parents that go around like they're God's gift to the world, because they are parents, are missing a key point: they are guilty until proven innocent.

No, you cannot take up the entire street or aisle with your stroller because you have a child. Until your child shows signs of contributing to society, it is just an enormous element of your carbon footprint.

Go ahead and have eleven kids, if the eleventh grows up to bring us the Colbert Report. Hell, if he or she turns out to be a fantastic social worker, that's great, too. But until then, get over yourself and stop blocking passageways. Oh, and another thing: unless you live in a country that quashes your reproductive rights (which we will not let happen here, because we will all vote in November), or you belong to a sect, etc., please don't bitch about having to support that kind of brood.

On that topic, I have a few things to say to those of you who have enormous cars. It's about time your wallets felt the real cost of your decision.

I'm not going to get self-righteous on you. I'm not one of those clever cyclists who puts a $00.00 gas sign sticker on her bike. I know that many people don't have a =choice in how much they drive. I know that some vulnerable people are hurting.. As for the rest of you, however, who do have a choice in where to live and what kind of car to buy, I don't want to hear it.

The same goes for food prices. I am not happy about rising food prices, and I know that many people are profoundly affected. However, there are also people who just need to STFU. You're not entitled to steak, for which you have not been bearing the real cost and still don't. Get yourself some canned, or even dry beans and some whole grains, and move on with your life.

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Another anecdote from Martha:

Sometimes I go to the Fresh Pond Starbucks to grade papers during the school day, to avoid distractions from the younger population. I was there in June, sitting at a table, my papers stacked on the table. A father (presumably) came in with two kids, probably around four (girl) and six (boy). While he stood in line, the kids sat on the floor at opposite ends of the store and proceeded to roll a ball back and forth. Several people gave the father glances, but he didn't do anything. When he'd gotten the food (and a newspaper!), he sat down to read and ignored his kids. The boy kept going to fetch straws (to construct something out of them) and kept walking up against my table to do so. A couple of times he hit some papers, and I'd have to pick things up. Then the kids proceeded to climb from chair to chair, table to table, now with their shoes off, playing some sort of "don't touch the floor" game. When the boy tried to climb onto my table, I spoke to him. The father ignored me. I finally was fed up and spoke to the father, trying to be friendly enough, but it got nastier. This is what I remember:

me: You could take them to a park. There are some close by.
him: They're fine here.
me: They're bored. You could play with them or talk to them.
him: Don't tell me how to parent.
me: But they're disruptive to other customers, and you're ignoring them.
him: That's my choice. Don't tell me what to do.
me: I wish you luck when they're teenagers. I can only imagine.

He was pissed at me. The other customers nodded approvingly, and the kids quieted down and "read" a book together, which proved my point that kids appreciate some guidance. Like, Liam today on the train tried to sit between two adults (both reading) when there were plenty of other open seats available. I moved him. He initially protested but got it when I explained that he might "bump" one of the passengers, given how squirmy he is, and that's it's polite to leave space between people on the train whenever possible.

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Check out more coffeeshop drama here.