good question

"What is up with your mother??"

Last night I had a beautiful rooftop/sunset dinner, complete with view of the National Cathedral and great conversation, which I occasionally marred with the odd mom quote. After a handful of those, sprinkled in throughout the evening, the friend of a the friend on whose roof we were dining just had to ask.

Earlier that day, mom had called.

A.: Hello?

[Pause]

Dad: Hello.

[Pause]

Dad: Mom says, "why haven't you called?"

A.: Why haven't I called? I was going to call in an hour or so.

Mom, in an angry but faint voice: Why haven't you called earlier? Why didn't you call yesterday?

I realize now that the pausing is not pausing at all. It's mom speaking through her speakerphone, for no reason except because she likes to avail herself of gadgetry, even when it does not enhance whatever she is trying to do.

A.: I didn't have time. Wendy was here, and we went to a party last night....

Mom: You don't need time! You can't take five minutes away from whatever you're doing?

A.: Five minutes?

Mom: It's not like our conversations ever last longer than five minutes.

Okay, first of all, no, I'm not going to excuse myself from a social event or a friend's short visit to call my mother, with whom I spoke on four days ago, when I can just wait a day and call her then. Second, it's when I do think I can get a quick conversation out of the way that I get in trouble, because mom starts asking me preposterous questions that annoy me all the more because I'm in a hurry to do something else. See 4th of July post.

A.: I think they often do.

Mom: You have to keep us posted.

A.: There has been no news about which to keep you posted between Wednesday night and now.

Mom then huffed for a few more minutes about my not calling. Presumably she really enjoys talking about my not calling, so I would just take that away from her if I called more often.