You don't have a river

Mom: I've bought the most beautiful decorations at A.J. Wright.
A.: Do you really need any more stuff?
Mom: It's beautiful stuff.
A.: [Shrug]
Dad: When are you closing?
A.: On Halloween. Did you see the comps and stats that I sent you?
Mom: Yeah, I saw all that.
A.: Are you still concerned that I'm overpaying?
Mom: The comps and stats are irrelevant. There hasn't been an economy like this since the Great Depression. Prices are still coming down...
A.: In this area they're not.
Mom: It's the same situation here, especially in the nicer areas by the river. I was looking and it's hard to find anything really nice. And we live in such a convenient location-- minutes from the express bus, minutes from so many parks.
A.: It's similar here.
Mom: No, no, it's not the same. You don't have a river.
A.: Actually, I do.
Mom: It's not the same!

I'm not sure how this got competitive. I was just trying to reassure her that I'm making a good investment, in a good area, and all of the sudden, she's trying to one-up me. And actually, the river widens and gets beautiful very close to where I live. We've walked in one of the more scenic areas. That's where she first pointed out that the way I walk is not sexy, or rather verbally barraged me about it.

A.: Mom, I'm not going to argue with you about Boston vs. DC. I'm just letting you know that it's a good area.
Mom: You don't have the ocean...
A.: What have you been doing?
Mom: We were dealing with a fallen branch earlier today. Thankfully it didn't hit the car. And then I've been spending a lot of time on the mushrooms. I have plenty for you, too.
A.: I'm afraid I'm not going to take them this time around.
Mom: Oh, that's fine. We'll bring them down when we visit. It'll probably make the most sense to do that when you'll be moving.
A.: Actually, not really. You can come for Dad's birthday.
Mom: That's ages from now. [It's in January.]
A.: Well, it doesn't make sense to come down to help me move, since I'm coming up for Thanksgiving right after I move, and then up for the holidays shortly after that.
Mom: We'll see.
A.: Okay.