For some topics it doesn't have to be a good time

I'm not even sure how to blog about this. At first, nothing unusual-- I turned my phone on in the morning to a message from mom and expected to hear how intrigued she was that I was, presumably, already in bed when she called, but when I called her back, she didn't say anything about that. She asked me if I wanted her to buy me a suitcase on wheels, because I always have so much stuff to take back with me whenever I visit. And oh by the way, was I thinking of visiting? It's really too bad I won't be coming up for Labor Day. They went to Horseneck Beach the other weekend and it was just perfect-- best beach trip ever. Soft waves, great weather, everything.

Mom even expressed genuine excitement about my job:

A.: I told you I'm going to Kansas City?
Mom: You said probably but you weren't sure. When are you leaving?
A.: Tuesday.
Mom: For how long?
A.: Returning Friday.
Mom: So why can't you come up for Labor Day?
A.: I have plans here and I need to get ready for the trip.
Mom: But it's only four days.
A.: I still need to get ready for it.
Mom: What kind of violations are you going to find??
A.: Um... we don't really know yet...
Mom: Oh, okay.

I was very happy that she was satisfied with that response.

Anyway, then she asked me if I had time for her to talk to me about something else. I said not really (I was at work) but go ahead. And she basically told me she thought my cousin might be suicidal.

This is not really the time to wonder about mom's way of doing things, but... she'll call me and start rattling off what I need to put into a complaint letter to Verizon without asking if it's a good time, but when family's in trouble, she does ask? Why is this not the first thing she told me?

I'm not particularly close to this cousin. He lives in Toronto. I've only met him a few times. But he's still my cousin, and I still care. But since I hardly know him, I have no idea what to do. I can't really call him out of the blue without his suspecting that my other cousin must have told my mom and my mom told me.

Mom: If he were here, there would be support groups or something...
A.: I'm sure there's no shortage of those in Toronto...
Mom: I don't know what to do.
A.: Me neither...
Mom: You'll think about it?
A.: Of course.

I thought, it may be that mom may feel prematurely frustrated because she's attempted to intervene to stop the self-destruction of another cousin (well, in her case, nephew) on my dad's side, but that wasn't this serious. Which is saying a lot because it was pretty f*ing serious. She, rightly, tried to convince him not to cosign on a loan for a (predatory) friend. He didn't listen, but he's fine now, albeit climbing out of six figures in debt and as always struggling with his cerebral palsy. So I was thinking about this, thought that cousin would be a good one to intervene, and called mom back just now.

A.: Does Dmitri know about this?
Mom: About what?
A.: About Sasha.
Mom: I don't know, I doubt it. We don't know for sure yet what's really going on.

[Two seconds later]

Mom: I gathered more mushrooms today. I couldn't help myself. You'll take some when you visit?
A.: Sure, I'll take some wine, too. Which means I may drive.
Mom: Drive? It's so expensive.
A.: Less than flying. And I wouldn't have to deal with the liquids ban.
Mom: There's a liquids ban?
A.: Where have you been??
Mom: Oh, yeah. But you can check luggage.
A.: Which also incurs a fee.
Mom: No it doesn't.
A.: Yes it does.
Mom: Sometimes, maybe.
A.: I'm not going to argue with you about this.
Mom: Well, you know Alia's coming. I keep trying to convince her that there's no need to see Washington.

I didn't say, except that she's an artist and DC has some of the best museums in the country, but I will next time we revisit that conversation, because I'm sure we will.

Stay tuned.