I'm fat, continued

Mom: Oh, I keep meaning to call Emma. She had an operation.
A.: How did it go? [Turning to Anya]: I stayed with Emma in Australia.
Mom: I know you did. And you said she fed you well and persistently... but when you came back from Australia you weren't fat.
A.: Actually, according to you I was.
Mom: No you weren't. You never used to put on weight. What happened?
A.: Starost nye Radost.
[Translation: literally, 'Old age is not joy'; more figuratively, 'old age brings complications].

For those of you who, like my mother, wonder why I'm not as thin as I used to be, I offer the following hypotheses:

I'm not as young as I used to be
I no longer cycle to work
It's the holidays, and junkfood abounds

***
After dinner, I showed Greece and Turkey photos. My mother responded by one-upping at every other photo:
Dad: What a beautiful mosaic!
Mom: Remember the mosaics in southern Spain? Those were beautiful.

Anya: That's a gorgeous coastline.
Mom: I have memories of the coastline near Naples...

A.: [Narrating the pictures] That's the bazaar...
Mom: Thanks for not bringing us anything. I still don't know what to do with that thing [pointing to a gift I'd brought her from an earlier trip].